Thread: Have you ever lost a friend to suicide without knowing the reason?

Ever lost a friend to suicide even without knowing the reason for it?
I had a friend who was always jovial and happy-go-lucky. She was once close with our group and then she as we grew up she drifted apart and made some new friends. Even so, we kept in touch and would joke around once in a while.
So one day, after a long time, she came and sat with us in the interval and talked about her family and that was the first time she has ever been so open about the most private details of her life. We were shocked a bit that she is being so open with us but we were happy that she trusted us enough to share these things. And then within the next week, she committed suicide by burning herself in kerosene. We never got to know why she did that and in a way, I feel guilty that something was eating her mind and I couldn't solve it. Even now, we wonder why she suddenly opened herself up to us. MAybe she wanted to share something with us, but we did not understand it.

Ever gone through such experience?

Originally Posted by Shana

Ever lost a friend to suicide even without knowing the reason for it?
I had a friend who was always jovial and happy-go-lucky. She was once close with our group and then she as we grew up she drifted apart and made some new friends. Even so, we kept in touch and would joke around once in a while.
So one day, after a long time, she came and sat with us in the interval and talked about her family and that was the first time she has ever been so open about the most private details of her life. We were shocked a bit that she is being so open with us but we were happy that she trusted us enough to share these things. And then within the next week, she committed suicide by burning herself in kerosene. We never got to know why she did that and in a way, I feel guilty that something was eating her mind and I couldn't solve it. Even now, we wonder why she suddenly opened herself up to us. MAybe she wanted to share something with us, but we did not understand it.

Ever gone through such experience?

My friends younger brother , hanged himself recently.. the reason still remains as a mystery. They have family problems for many years. But why he did it after all these days is a question!

Originally Posted by Karikaalan

My friends younger brother , hanged himself recently.. the reason still remains as a mystery. They have family problems for many years. But why he did it after all these days is a question!

I know that people say Suicide is the coward's tool. But as I see it, suicide requires a lot of courage than anything. I just wish those who think of killing themselves got a chance to share their pain at least once. And seeing the case you mentioned, something must have been torturing their minds, or it might be a rash decision. Either way, they leave others to feel guilty for not having saved them...

Originally Posted by Shana

I know that people say Suicide is the coward's tool. But as I see it, suicide requires a lot of courage than anything. I just wish those who think of killing themselves got a chance to share their pain at least once. And seeing the case you mentioned, something must have been torturing their minds, or it might be a rash decision. Either way, they leave others to feel guilty for not having saved them...

Suicide need courage. But we should not motivate them.. and It is really a relief to share things with others. Everyone must have a person who can act like listening to the problems. Suicides are not a decision made my a single person.. sorounding people decide it. His death still haunts all my friends. He was having fun chat with us the previous week in our hostel. The reason he told for coming to hostel was , he felt like seeing his brother's friends . ..' for the last time ' he never said those 4 words .

Originally Posted by Karikaalan

Suicide need courage. But we should not motivate them.. and It is really a relief to share things with others. Everyone must have a person who can act like listening to the problems. Suicides are not a decision made my a single person.. surrounding people decide it. His death still haunts all my friends. He was having fun chat with us the previous week in our hostel. The reason he told for coming to hostel was , he felt like seeing his brother's friends . ..' for the last time ' he never said those 4 words .

That is depressing...
I wonder why those people who commit suicide feel so talkative days before their death...
Is it a subconscious realization that they won't be seeing us ever again in life?
Did they actually know they were gonna kill themselves or death is waiting for them?

Originally Posted by Shana

That is depressing...
I wonder why those people who commit suicide feel so talkative days before their death...
Is it a subconscious realization that they won't be seeing us ever again in life?
Did they actually know they were gonna kill themselves or death is waiting for them?

I have heard that when people really struggle and want to end their life they like to meet all the people they wanted to. Some people take instantaneous decision .that's not the case here.

Originally Posted by Karikaalan

I have heard that when people really struggle and want to end their life they like to meet all the people they wanted to. Some people take instantaneous decision .that's not the case here.

Makes sense...
Now my guilty feeling is rising up to the peak!